Hi, My name is Melissa

During my first few days at college, I attended an orientation meeting for a Korean student organization. Not knowing too many other students, I was eager to find a sense of belonging. I assumed that, like me, most attendees would be looking to make new connections in this new environment. However, as presentations ended and mingling began, it became clear that many already knew each other. People quickly formed groups and huddled together, leaving me feeling out of place. Initially, I stood alone, smiling and hoping that someone would approach me. But as minutes passed, I realized I had a choice - go back to my dorm room or do something.

Growing up, I had never learned how to network or socialize with strangers. In my Korean culture and family, being reserved and respectful was valued, especially as a young woman. This meant that when faced with events or gatherings, it was second nature to stay on the sidelines and observe rather than engage. Moreover, as a natural introvert, the thought of introducing myself to someone I didn't know filled me with anxiety.

Despite my instinct to simply go back to my room, I recognized that nothing would change if I didn’t take action. I wondered how I would ever get to know others and how they would get to know me. So I summoned a bit of courage, took a deep breath, walked up to a group of strangers, put my hand out and said “Hi, my name is Melissa.” And just like that, my networking journey began.

Over time, I learned that networking wasn't about being the most outgoing or charismatic person in the room, but rather about being genuine and showing interest in others. As is often said, it’s better to be interested than interesting. This shift in perspective, along with consistent practice, made approaching strangers feel less daunting and more like an opportunity to form meaningful connections.

Over three decades have passed since that pivotal moment, and I still approach each event with the same mindset. Just last week, at a local bar association luncheon, I found myself among strangers once again. Without hesitation, I took a deep breath, pinned my name tag, walked right into a circle, extended my hand, and introduced myself, “Hi, my name is Melissa…”